When I say trust, I can’t stop humming the below song from Bruno Mars.
If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea
I'll sail the world to find you
If you ever find yourself lost in the dark
and you can't see I'll be the light to guide you…
We'll find out what we're made of
When we are called to help our friends in need …
You can count on me like one, two, three
What is a promise?
Promises are the commitment that one makes so that others can trust them. And trust is important for keeping up with your desired relationships. Human connections are all about being there when one is going through a tough time or cheering and clapping for the emotional nest who is overcoming an obstacle. Sometimes it is also about sharing happiness and victories with others. Trust is the basic foundation of any relationship. Especially when you are dealing with your tweens.
Here is what your tween will takeaway if you keep your promise
Promises show effort: Keeping a promise is never easy. We have built a world full of a lot of excuses and we don’t really want to make efforts towards keeping our words, and when promises break, they do hurt much. Why is keeping a promise hard? Because we need to step outside of our wants and focus on fulfilling the stated goal for someone else. Here most of the enthusiasm for keeping a promise dies because at the end of the day we are somehow selfish and we are so much obsessed with ourselves that we never really want to do something for someone. But if you are keeping your promises then it defines your seriousness towards the commitment the relationship involves. Keeping promises with your tween teaches them trust and the importance of emotional investments.
Promises earn respect: Now this is common. Being a parent, you can have complaints that your kid is being disrespectful to you. You have to really earn that respect from your tween. When you don’t keep your word, your little one sees a lack of integrity in you. Integrity is the foundation of respect. When you keep your promises to your kid, they learn what commitment is and they love you even more. When you are more consistent with your promises, they start seeing you as the ideal figure that they want to become.
Promises build self-esteem: Okay let’s be honest. If you put effort into something or someone, the feeling that person experiences is “I am worth it and that’s why the person is putting in so much effort into me” . Similarly, with your child, When you keep your word, they feel confident, and this develops a sense of worthiness hence building their self-esteem.
Promises maintain a good relationship: Action speaks louder than words. Yes, they do. Promises are the efforts that explain the love and connection we hold for others. And when it comes to love, we all starve for care and affection. Tweens want that too but with more flavors of attention. And when we keep our promises, we prepare our tweens for being better friends, siblings, spouses and parents. Remember the basics of every relation remain the same, the chemistry only makes it a little different.
Promises do enclose another promise: You be there for me and I will do the same. This applies to all the relations we have. So when your tween knows that you keep fulfilling the promises that you make then they will take the small initiative too (maybe a promise). Witness their dedication to fulfilling the same. And trust me, there is no ending to these valuable promises then.
Sometimes the lips make promises that the heart is doubtful about keeping.
Things to think about before you make promises:
· Is there anything urgent which can act as a road blocker from fulfilling the promise?
· Are you setting a timeline? If yes, is that suitable for you?
· Do you have double thoughts about the promise? If yes, drop it then and there.
· Do you really want to make a promise, or are you doing it just for the sake of it?
· Are you taking full accountability of your words? Make sure, there is no room for excuses here.
Don’t let the promises turn into lies.
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