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Writer's pictureRashmi Mishra

I wish it could have been different!

Every teen needs some privacy


Earphones on, confidence high, mind on lyrics, feet on music and me, me on cloud 9. Imagining myself as a singer performing in front of the college crowd and audience cheering me up. Ever happened to you?


It was my dream to be a Rockstar. I kept reliving this dream every evening from 7 to 7:30 in my mind. Must be wondering why 7 to 7:30? My mom used to step out of the home and I had my own personal space that was not so personal post 7:30. I always wished for my own room where I can paint the wall red, put on Shakira’s poster, a fashionable closet, my dvd player and some books along with the finest makeup products. But guess what? I belong to a middle class family and having a private room was a dream back by then.



Credits: Kaboompics.com



I am 28 today. Even if I try to make my parents understand why a teen needs privacy, they won’t understand but yes, you, reading this article, you might! First of all it is completely natural. Your tween is trying to figure out what kind of person they are, what their interests are and whom they want to be friends with. Let’s put the pros of teens having their privacy because I am sure you must have documented the cons somewhere in your mind.


  1. Psychological need: I still feel sorry about myself. I wish I could have my privacy. The privacy I could have explored more in knowing myself. The privacy I could have used in learning more life lessons. The privacy I could have used in making my network wider. The privacy I could have used in crafting more of my dreams.At this stage I was dealing with fears but luring for desires. The perplexity was at peak and hence I became clueless because honestly I hadn’t had a chance to deal with all. But I wish you would give this opportunity to your adolescent.


Credits: Martproduction


2. Drawing boundaries:There is a legit difference between checking on to them and spying over them. Place your trust right, teach them their responsibilities towards themselves and let the flower bloom. Respect their privacy and let them explore the persona they want to turn into. A lot of interference, directions and complaints never work. I wish I could have placed my desire strongly on being a singer rather than following what my father wanted me to become.



Credits: Dương Nhân


3. Being adaptive: Once you set your teen free, they start figuring out things on their own. They might pack their bags themselves, make a list of things they would be needing, learn to drive, decide certain things on their own and manage their own schedule. The need for privacy is important also to make your tween self-sufficient. Let this change serve a good purpose.



Credits: Norma Mortenson


4. Shaping confidence: Now quickly read the above three pointers and tell me, if you let your teen have their own personal space and all of the above three pointers are being served, won’t it boost your teen confidence? Indeed, it will. Over the period of adolescence, Confidence is one of the most important factors; If your pubescent can make things go right in their own direction keeping all the non-negotiable factors in mind and knowing that their parents trust them, they will be doing great going forward.



Credits: Rodnae Production


5. For a healthy relationship: When there are mutual and clear rules in the house and members respect each other keeping privacy in their mind, that's when we say that the decorum of the home is in place. Your teen will respect you much more if you will attain their concern of having their own privacy, letting them take their authentic calls and coaching them, rather than spying. They will be the one sharing things with you without you being nosey.



Credits: Andrea Piacquadio




Re-iterating the above discussion shortly, privacy is not a privilege it is a right. Your teen is in the journey of self-discovery. Let them discover themselves and make the way easy for them so that they find their Ikigai soon



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